Stop Looking for Perfect Relationships

Wish you had a “perfect” relationship with your spouse?

Or with your mother-in-law?

Or with your teenage child?

Or with your paying client?

Or with your cat?

“I wish I had if my spouse/mother-in-law/teenage child/paying client or cat would act in a certain way, then my relationship with them would be perfect!”

If you’re thinking like this, STOP!

Just stop.

Why?

You’ll end up wasting your life if you expect “others” to be perfect.

And you know what, if you continue expecting others to be perfect, you’ll go mad and feel more insecure with every failed expectation that doesn’t live up to your fantasy of perfection.

We seek others to behave in a certain way that feels perfect to us, but if you reflect on it, you realize that it never happens that way.

Expectation is a perceived state within your mind, and other’s behaviors cannot be controlled by a certain perceived state of your mind.

Relationships are always imperfect, but they feel perfect to you at certain times.

Reason?

You’re alive!

Here’s a fun fact: only dead things are perfect, living beings are NEVER.

Rather than expecting someone else to behave in a particular way that matches our definition of perfection, what if we grow entirely into ourselves and realize our own imperfections.

• We accept ourselves the way we are and the way we are not.
• We recognize that we may also be imperfect from someone else’s point of view.
• We acknowledge that and see how we can inspect our behaviors and adapt to create a situation that we enjoy despite our imperfections.
• We accept others the way they are and the way they are not.
• We agree to disagree.
• We don’t let other people’s imperfections affect our emotions.

Other people’s imperfection is an outer happening. An emotion is an inner happening.

Don’t let outer happenings enslave your inner happenings.

Will you be able to influence others to change?

Maybe. Maybe not.

Will you be able to feel good no matter if your expectations are met or not?

You will be when you practice it deliberately.

Now let me tell you this: you look for perfect relationships because you think perfect relationships will make you happy.

But you know what, you do have the power to be happy despite the realm of imperfect relationships that you are surrounded with.

How come?

Because happiness is an inner happening, a perfect relationship is an outer!

Okay, I get it. Imperfect relationships won’t make you happy, but if you start looking beyond perfection, the outcome of an imperfect relationship will have less power over your emotions.

So, what do you want to do? Give a sh*t about how your relationships can become perfect if others act in a certain way or…?

Think for yourself. 🍃